I made it through the day with out too much incident. It helped that I didn't move around much. No big errands to run or things requiring my attention today. I got to just spend it present. Consciously. I sat and just listened and watched, engaging when and how I chose.
FINDING THE LOVE
I watched the movie Enemy at the Gate. It was a beautifully told story. Cinematography. Character. Music. Discipline. Heart. Enjoyed the depths of those choices. It made me think about hope and those face the music kind of moments when there is no way out.
I like observing other people's views of the world. People are art. The villains. The Heroes. The Humor. The Struggle. The Story. The love. We are all pieces of moving art. A testament to our perceptions, desires, and purpose.
Everyone as a role to play in reality. In the system. The cycle. But that's just one side of the coin. Half the story. The other side is the Connection. Emotions. Moments. Choices. Character. Laughter. Love. Agony. Despair. We are all Endless Possibilities. We are Choices. How we find hope. What truly touches our heart.
Then there is the edge of the coin itself. That is where I dwell. The magic. The in between. The edge. The bridge. Bridging the two sides.
Here dwell the observers. The Writers. The Artists. The Performers. The Bewitched. The Disciplined. The Free. The ones who express because they have no choice. It enraptures them to the point that it becomes their very essence. Overflowing and spilling out in Determination. Devotion. Dedication. Passion. Purpose. Poise.
The moments that matter most. That stand out the most and touch our hearts in truly profoundly ways, are the entire reason I live. That is the side off life we have forgotten to see. For a while there it was sliding slowly out in to and past our periphery. Regardless of the record spinning, there is so much life in the grooves and peaks spiraling ever on. Moments of plateaus. Open space. Cresting Inclines. Summit. Peak. Pinnacle. Crown. Apex. That shit right there is transformative.
I know not everyone gets it and that's ok. Not everyone will. It makes it feel like it's mine. All mine. Just for me. Indestructible. It is something that goes beyond my understanding so I enjoy it where I can see it now.
Gabe and Sophie like to show each other their new discoveries. Whether it's a new object or a new idea. It's a joy to watch. Today it was dirt waterfalls and blue rocks.
Izabel said "Hey mom! wanna see this?" and as I rose to my feet and started heading her direction I replied "No I'd rather see the back of my eyelids but that's not happening" then we both laughed.
MY SOUNDTRACK
- King - Zayde Wolf
- Make it Rain - Foy Vance
- Unholy War - Jacob Banks
- Mellow Out - Nathaniel Rateliff
- I Just Want to Tell You - Robert Finley
- Monster - Jacob Banks
- It takes a lot to know - Damien Rice
- New Blood - Zayde Wolf
- Why Can't I Fall In Love - Ivan Neville
LAUGHS
Santa Clarita Diet. I love the comedy to be found when they are faced with absolute absurdity and just sort of accept the reality of it. I love everyone's acceptance of it in episode 10.
Don't make me come in there and cut my sentence shor.......
What if I recorded my tummy gurgles and played it backwards and found out they have been talking to me the whole time. Saying shit like 'I'm a little teapot' and 'I am lion, hear me roar' and 'feed me Seymour'
If you don't answer, will I end every sentence in a question? Yes?
RANDOM LIKES
- Lighting
- The sounds at night time. The sounds of people subside and slowly get replaced with crickets. frogs. owls. insects. The gentle luring hum of the night. I love it.
- Watermelon Jolly Ranchers
- Beethoven
- Bondage
- Challenges
- Puzzles
- Passion
- The long game
- Seduction
SNAPSHOTS
Random Thoughts
Mandala Effect, Parallel Universes. Universal Consciousness. 10%. 100.
Having these experiences of my literal perspective changing. To feeling SUPER 3D. It is so trippy and no I have never done any drug that would cause that. It's like a feeling of 4 dimensions in a more precise way. Less rounded. Like if vertigo and being in a virtual reality headset had a child.
Asperger's. Intelligent logical thinking with speech being more intentional. This made me think of all the people trying to be normal. Define normal. Fit in. Feel never good enough. In my experience anyway. Then there are people's whose minds work in different ways. They aren't imperfections to normal. They aren't imperfections at all. It is that imperfection that makes them more. More creative.
I feel sad for women who don't know how to really enjoy their own bodies. The pleasure in pleasure. To be a woman. To feel that divine nature of beauty and awe within ourselves. I also feel for the ones who feel guilty for liking it and thinking that it somehow is a bad thing.
What is imperfection? I think it's being perfectly flawed.
The seven wonders of the world.
To See. To Hear. To Taste. To Touch. To Feel. To Love. To Live
To find love you must give love. To find anything you must give it first. We are products of our own circumstance. We must give with no expectations. You give simply because you want to, because it makes your heart happy.
I judge people on the way they treat the people they feel are beneath them. How do they treat others with less than they have? That is how I choose who to invest in.
Don't let life define you. You define it!
I don't throw old stories away. I release them after I really put myself in the other persons shoes with no judgments. I think about what they've been taught and how would I approach a past version of myself.
Snow...paradox...conundrum....perplexing...bi linear...cuddles...holidays...pounding, pulsing blues chords on a guitar...bass guitar...words...wonder...electric.
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