The next dream at 6 years old was our house in the middle of the night with all the furniture out of the wood floor living room. There was a circle of curtains standing the in the middle and again something small and gurgglie on the other side. I just remember it was pig-men and it was battle royale.
I have a 99% call rate on my memory. It's sharp and forever imprinting. My dreams have always been extremely vivid and detailed. Like one back in my high school days where my friend and I were walking to this 5 story building and there was a giant pink rabbit sitting next to it. The rabbit's mouth just at the roof line of the building. Find out it's a giant slide so my friend races to the top and slides down, popping out of the toe. I leave her to her fun and decide to walk back to the houseboat and as I'm meandering down a wooded path my sister lifts the edge of the pool up so that all the water is now rushing at me. Once at the houseboat I go below and join in a card game with a Chinese man who is sitting next to the hot tub. After losing several hands I sat down in the hot tub and looked at my ankle which has a thin line of black hair slowly growing up my leg and a small appendage is extending from the ball joint. A few moments later it's an Indian who tosses a card at me and gives me passing life wisdom.
I dream in color and in any dream I can tell you what everyone was wearing, the colors of it, and if I had any artistic talent at all with perspective I could draw them. I have the standard being chased kind of dreams but they repeat like video game levels more than anything. I just keep going and trying a different thing each time until I find one that works. I had your standard nightmare kind of dreams where a t-rex is stalking the house and looking in the windows or everyone laughing at me kind of things. After kids the nightmares really got quite intense until I learned how to keep them out of my dreams.
I have even died on a few occasions and I always find those so interesting. Once I drowned and sunk to the bottom of the pool ever so slowly. Another time I was shot in the head in a parking garage and I remember the smell of the asphalt and watching the blood slowly pool and run down the ramp as the sound of my heartbeat slowed and my vision faded.
Then there are the other kinds of dreams. The sentient ones. The ones that over time and space link together forming a town of their own. Like my mind has built a state and when I have a dream I know it's location within or around that town in that state. It's bits and pieces of all kinds of places and things from my experiences. Sometimes they have nothing to do with me at all.
My dreams are populated. Mostly by strangers. In fact I very rarely dreams about living people that I know. I have had dreams of dead loved ones who occasionally pop by for a visit or to let me know something. I remember telling my mother 2 weeks before her father died that he would be dying soon because of a dream I had.
A day after my fiance's suicide I dreamed I was sitting on a red velvet couch in a black void and he sat with me and told me excitedly about all the chemicals they used to embalm him and the stages they did things in and then mentioned being buried in Kentucky. The strange thing about this was I had no clue that was where the family plots were. I assumed because they lived in Alabama that their plots would be here. It wasn't until 3 days later I found out through a family member that he was in fact buried in Kentucky.
He would show up here and there in my dreams but he always kept his distance for the first few years. Until I had healed enough that I wouldn't wake up crying and looking for him. I got used to seeing him and most often we would just walk and talk until the time that I decided I was going to get married to my husband. In the dream I was in a parking lot at a grocery store and he came to let me know that it was ok and he wouldn't be around much because he wanted me to enjoy the rest of my life and the experiences to be had.
He only showed up once after that. He was moving stuff in to a small cottage that was set against rolling hills and shaded by a small grove of trees. He led me in to show me what he had been doing and when I stepped in I started to recognize everything. A carpet from one dream. A lamp from another. Everything was from my other dreams. I asked him what he was doing and he smiled and simply replied "I'm making a space for you that is comfortable for when it is the time to wait you will be surrounded by familiar comfortable things"
My ability to lucid dream has been growing. This has been a focus for me. I am becoming more and more aware of the fact that I'm dreaming, when I'm dreaming. I am so excited to get to a point where I can create and do whatever I want without the consequences of things like gravity.
I wrote all of this because I am curious what dreaming is like for other people. Do you dream in color? Do you dream of strangers? Do you dream of dying? Do yours feel like a movie or are sentient?
SOUNDTRACK
- Red Right Hand - Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds
- Lost Stars - Keira Knightley
- We Don't Need Another Hero - Tina Turner
- Goodnight My Friend - Galavant
I totally geeked out the last two days. Day one I spent immersed in puzzle games and brain games. The day after Isaac and I played Yahtzee for a while, I stared at Christmas lights through various containers and materials, and started building a puzzle.
Today it was made known to me that words with friends can be played in messenger without having to install the app. I figured this out when my sister decided to challenge me knowing full well I can't ignore word games. I... Must.... Play.... and so starts the battles. I currently have 5 different games going. I just simply can't resist. My family knows this and I think they do this on purpose.
No comments:
Post a Comment